Mentor Handbook

How we walk with broken men.

This handbook is the operating standard for every Forge mentor. Read it before your first assignment. Re-read it every quarter. If anything here is unclear, escalate to your Forge Leader before you act.

Vision of The Forge

The Forge exists to reach broken men with the love of Jesus, walk them through healing, build them into disciples, raise them into leaders, and send them to rebuild other men.

We are not a recovery programme. We are not a small group. We are not a counselling service. We are a band of brothers under the Lordship of Christ, helping men come out of the dark and step into who God made them to be.

What a Forge Mentor IS

A brother a few steps ahead, walking alongside a man who is where you used to be.
An accountable disciple of Jesus, submitted to local church leadership.
A faithful listener, present and consistent — usually weekly for at least six months.
A prayer warrior for the man in front of you.
An honest mirror — you ask the hard questions and refuse the easy answers.
A safeguarding-aware adult who knows when to escalate and never tries to be a hero.

What a Forge Mentor IS NOT

Not a counsellor, therapist, doctor, lawyer, or financial adviser. Refer when needed.
Not a saviour. Jesus saves. You walk alongside.
Not a friend in the casual sense — you carry weight, responsibility, and confidentiality.
Not anonymous. You operate inside The Forge's named, supervised structure.
Not the only support a man needs — always point him to the local church, professional help, and his family where appropriate.

Boundaries

Meet in a public or semi-public place where possible (café, church office, walk).
Keep digital communication on Forge-approved channels. No DMs that bypass the system.
Never meet alone with a minor, ever. Mentees under 18 must have a parent or guardian present and an approved youth pathway.
Mentors only mentor brothers of the same sex. The Forge is a men's discipleship platform.
Time-box the relationship: 6 months minimum, reviewed every quarter. You are not their permanent solution.
Do not lend money, sign for debts, or take on legal/financial responsibility for a mentee.

Confidentiality

What is shared in mentorship stays in mentorship — UNLESS one of the safeguarding exceptions applies. Mentees must know this at the first meeting.

Confidentiality is broken — and reported through proper Forge channels — in the following situations:

Risk of suicide or serious self-harm.
Risk of harm to another person (especially children, a partner, or vulnerable adults).
Disclosure of past or present abuse (sexual, physical, emotional, financial).
Disclosure of a criminal offence that places others at risk.
A clear pastoral concern that requires Forge Leader / Pastor involvement.

Safeguarding (Core)

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility, all the time. If in doubt, escalate. Better to over-report than under-report.

Read the full Forge Safeguarding Resource Pack at /forge/safeguarding before your first mentor meeting and at least once a year thereafter.

Escalation Procedures

Immediate danger (suicide attempt, violence in progress, child at risk): call 999 first. Then notify your Forge Leader via the platform escalation button.
Disclosure of abuse: do NOT investigate or confront the alleged abuser. Listen, document, escalate to a Forge Leader within 24 hours. They will follow the safeguarding protocol.
Serious mental-health concern: encourage GP / Samaritans (116 123) / NHS 111. Notify your Forge Leader.
All escalations are logged in the Forge audit log. This protects mentees, mentors, and the platform.

Responding to Crisis

Stay calm. Do not panic. Your steady presence is half the help.
Listen first. Do not lecture. Do not quote scripture as a deflection.
Ask: 'Are you safe right now? Are you with anyone? Is there a plan?'
If risk is immediate, call 999 / emergency services. Stay on the line with them until help arrives.
Escalate to your Forge Leader the same day. Document what happened.
Pray with them if appropriate. Get them to safe people. Follow up within 24 hours.

Supporting Men in Recovery

You are NOT a substitute for AA / NA / Celebrate Recovery / clinical rehab. Reinforce those.
Don't ask 'are you using?' as an opener. Build trust. They'll tell you.
Relapse is part of the journey for many. Receive a relapse with compassion AND a clear next-step plan.
Watch for signs: missed meetings, secrecy, mood swings, isolation, money disappearing.
Loop in family / accountability partners only with the brother's permission, except where safeguarding requires it.

Supporting Men in Marriage Challenges

Never speak to the wife about her husband's mentorship. That is HIS relationship.
Never give legal or marital-counselling advice. Refer to qualified Christian marriage counsellors / pastors.
If you suspect domestic abuse (against the wife or by the wife), escalate to your Forge Leader immediately — do not try to mediate.
Encourage repentance, honesty, prayer, and pursuing his wife. Hold him accountable for HIS half of the marriage.

Supporting Fathers

Help him bless his children, repent where needed, and re-engage practically.
If he discloses anger / harshness toward children, take it seriously. Hold him to specific changes. If you suspect harm — escalate immediately.
Encourage time with kids, prayer over kids, and modelling repentance.

Prayer Ministry Guidelines

Pray WITH, not just FOR. Short, honest, specific.
Do not 'pray over' a man in ways that feel manipulative, theatrical, or coercive.
Never lay hands on a man in a way that crosses physical or emotional boundaries.
Deliverance ministry is NOT a mentor's role. Refer up to Forge leadership.
If unsure, just say: 'Father, meet my brother today. Strengthen him. Heal him. In Jesus' name. Amen.' That is enough.

Meeting Structure (Suggested)

Open in prayer (1 min).
Check in honestly — Forge accountability questions (10 min).
Review last week's challenge from the current Forge module (5 min).
Discuss the current module / pastoral issue / scripture (20 min).
Identify ONE next step for the week ahead (5 min).
Close in prayer (2 min).
Document in the mentor notes section within 24 hours.

Documentation Expectations

Log each meeting in the Forge Mentor Notes (private to you and Forge leadership).
Note: date, attendance, key topics, prayer requests, next step, any concerns.
Any safeguarding concern MUST also trigger an escalation through the dedicated workflow — notes alone are not enough.
Never store mentee information outside the Forge platform.

Code of Conduct

Walk in personal integrity, accountability, and submission to your local church.
Maintain your own mentor (Senior Mentor or Forge Leader) — no mentor stands alone.
Never use the mentor relationship to gain influence, favours, money, or personal services.
Do not engage in romantic, sexual, or emotionally-dependent dynamics with anyone in the platform.
Honour the testimony of Jesus and Powerhouse Beacon in everything you say and post publicly.
Step down voluntarily if your own walk is in crisis — and let leadership re-equip you.

Mentor Commitment Agreement

By accepting a Forge mentor role you commit to:

Meet your assigned brother at least once every 14 days for six months.
Log every meeting in the platform within 24 hours.
Escalate any safeguarding concern immediately, without exception.
Submit to Forge leadership review and ongoing development.
Maintain your own walk with Jesus, your own mentor / accountability, and your own commitment to a local church.
Resign your mentor role voluntarily if you are unable to maintain these standards in a given season.